Personal - File under: crap I will never do

I came up with a great website idea. I call it "www.twentypoundturd.com". The tagline is "Worthless cool stuff" and we'll sell only cool gadgets and Chotzkes that serve no real purpose. Like... I don't know... how about a dog-doo paperweight. Or an Azeroth Kommunity Kollege t-shirt? (WoW fans will get it.) Or pre-printed blank copy paper? A kleenex box that has an eraseable surface so you could write messages on it.

Personal - R2-D2, where are you?

The Voice-Activated R2-D2 of my dreams.

*sigh* Someday I shall have a REAL astromech droid.

Personal - Turkey and Bond

Ate too much yesterday. Who did'nt, right.

I love Bond movies. Spike is doing a Bondathon so my fat arse is parked in front to the telly for the duration.

My top five Bond-girls (subject to change):
5. Jill St. John as Tiffany Case
4. Britt Ekland as Mary Goodnight
3. Barbara Carrera as Fatima Blush
2. Sophie Marceau as Elektra King
1. Famke Janssen as Xenia Onatopp

Man, I wish I was as cool as Bond.

Politics - Lies, Damn lies and Bush Co.

Source: WSJ.com

Do you think that the Bush administration generally provides accurate information regarding current issues or do you think they generally mislead the public on current issues to achieve its own end?

Generally accurate ...................32%
Generally misleading ...................64%
Not sure/refused ...................4%

Do you think that the current situation with former Vice Presidential Chief of Staff Lewis "Scooter" Libby is an isolated incident or is this an indication of a larger problem in the Bush administration?

An isolated incident ...................35%
An indication of larger
problem in the Bush
administration ...................55%
Not sure/refused ...................10%

Current events - X Box 360 gets sacrificed

Xbox 360 suffers ritual sacrifice "A BRAND new Xbox 360 was ritually sacrificed in front of a large line of Xbox Fanboys waiting to buy the latest machines."

One said: "The person who did this should be dragged out into the street and castrated just for his pure disregard for the person who was the first one denied his 360 in that line. With the whole 360 shortage on launch, this is just a nasty asshole move that should not be tolerated."

Brilliant. There's no shortage of these machines kids. It's called marketing.

Politics - War on Freedom

Ok... So we've established that the president can impose a limit to our freedoms and that three years without charge if you are combatant in the "War on Terrah" is acceptable. So can Dubya extend this new presidential power to the "War on Drugs" or the "War on Illiteracy"? What about the "War on Poverty"?

Caught you with 1/4 ounce of pot? Three years in prsion, no lawyer, no trial, next!
Can you read this? No? Three years in prsion, no lawyer, no trial, next!
Give me a $100.00. Can't do it? Three years in prsion, no lawyer, no trial, next!

This needs to go to the Supreme Court before it happens again.

If Padilla is guilty, fuck him. Shoot him in the head on the street corner at noon. But give the guy a fair trial.

Personal - To do list

Add PAgent, Apocalyptic Blogger, and Kassi to my Blogroll.
Add the Agitator to Politics links.
Add salt to taste.
Serve over ice.

Personal - Well, it's not sterile, but...

Offspring wanted a bite of an apple I was eating the other day. Since she doesn't do too well with biting off from the apple, I reached in my pocket, pulled out my pocket knife and cut her off a slice. As she was about to bite into it the mate screamed, "Don't give her that!" I was a bit taken aback.

"That knife is not clean! Don't use it to feed my daughter!"

"Ummm... ok, but if it's clean enough to gut a fish it ought to be clean enough to cut an apple," I said.

She still doesn't think I'm as funny as I think I am.

Politics - Congress Helps Self to $3,100 Pay Raise

Congress Helps Self to $3,100 Pay Raise then postponed work on bills to curb spending on social programs and cut taxes in favor of a two-week vacation.

Disgusting. What's more disgusting is the people let them get away with it.

Humor - Comic Strips!

No more buying a paper just to read the Comic Strips. This site looks like it updates every day and has about two dozen strips. (some stinkers, some greats.)

Humor - Friday fun

The Webtender: Drinking Games

Bow Man

Copter

Personal - I went to the danger zone

The mate, offspring and I were on our way home from visiting the parental units when Kenny Loggins' Danger Zone came on the radio. I was in the far right lane and we were approaching an onramp. Another van started creeping out and directly in front of us and I deftly changed lanes, went around them and back into the right lane all the while singing at the top of my lungs. My wife just looked at me coldly.

When I realized she was giving me the evil eye I said, "What?"

She said, "You are not in a fighter jet. You could have slowed down back there."

I said, "Call me Iceman," and grinned at her. She doesn't think I'm as funny as I think I am.

Current events - Buncha clowns...

Politics - Why all the fuss over state sponsored propoganda?

Via Wonkette... "Fair And Balanced"

Current events - Evolve? Not in Kansas you don't!

From the editors of Scientific American: Kansas, Where "Ignorant" is the New "Educated"

From the Times of London: Kansas schools take step against evolution

From the Washington Post: Kansas Education Board First to Back 'Intelligent Design'

I'm so proud.

Current events - Welcome to Kansas... set your clocks back 150 years

TOPEKA — In the face of blistering criticism, the Kansas Board of Education approved its anti-evolution science standards today.


The 6-4 vote this afternoon followed the board’s conservative-moderate split and had been expected for months. This morning, during the board’s public input session, board members faced a litany of complaints from educators, scientists and concerned citizens.

“The standards are bad science… an abuse of the educational system and they advance a particular religious viewpoint,” said Jack Krebs, a science teacher and vice president of Kansas Citizens for Science, a group formed to fight the changes.

The standards cast doubt on evolution and redefine science to allow for non-natural explanations. After nearly a year of debate, a final vote on the standards is set for this afternoon.

I'm embarrassed, sick and very angry right now...

INTELLIGENT DESIGN IS NOT SCIENCE.

It belongs in a comparative religions or mythology class.

Media - Manga hits the mainstream newspapers

AOL News - U.S. Papers Pick Up Japanese-Style Comics
TOKYO (Nov. 7) - 'Doonesbury' and 'Peanuts,' make way for 'manga.' Come January, the Sunday funnies of several major North American newspapers will have doe-eyed women in frilly outfits, effeminate long-haired heroes and other trademark images of the Japanese comic style."

Humor - Crime Scene KC

2 girls, 1 shower: Chiefs fan slips on soap

"A Chiefs fan from Oklahoma must have been thinking what a great town Kansas City is - no sooner does he meet a new friend, Tina, at a Quik-Trip - she invites him to her place and hops in the shower with him.

Stepping out, the man finds Tina and her friend Stephanie are gone, along with:

* His wallet, with a) all his ID b) $12.00 c) Two Visa cards.
* Three Chiefs tickets (his and two pals' from OK)
* His cell phone
* His car keys
* His car (black 1999 Mitsubishi Gallant)

The man called his cell phone, Tina-Stephanie answered and said they'd be right back. Then they didn't answer anymore.

Independence police are checking into the shower address - it doesn't seem to belong to Tina or Stephanie. From the police report:

RO gave the victim a ride back to the Comfort Inn where his friend contacted the victim's family and was able to obtain the VIN and license number from the stolen Gallant...The victim and his two friends are stranded as the car they come up in, is the stolen vehicle."

There's a moral in here somewhere...not sure where."

Politics - It passed the senate 90 - 9 and yet Dubya still wants to veto the anti-torture bill

"The enemy we fight has no respect for human life or human rights. They dont deserve our sympathy. But this isnt about who they are. This is about who we are."

- John McCain

Disgraceful...

Health - Beer's hops seen to inhibit tumor growth

Oh yeah baby!

Humor - Panexa (Acidachrome Promanganate)

PANEXA! Ask your doctor for a reasoon to take it!: "PANEXA is a prescription drug that should only be taken by patients experiencing one of the following disorders: metabolism, binocular vision, digestion (solid and liquid), circulation, menstruation, cognition, osculation, extremes of emotion. For patients with coronary heart condition (CHC) or two separate feet (2SF), the dosage of PANEXA should be doubled to ensure that twice the number of pills are being consumed. PANEXA can also be utilized to decrease the risk of death caused by not taking PANEXA, being beaten to death by oscelots, or death relating from complications arising from seeing too much of the color lavender. Epileptic patients should take care to ensure tight, careful grips on containers of PANEXA, in order to secure their contents in the event of a seizure, caused by PANEXA or otherwise."

Current events - KC 27 Oak 23

I was standing in front of my TV (thinking about becoming a religious fellow) when my wife walked by, glanced at the screen and said, "Relax... they won." I looked at her and said, "WHAT?!?! They are down by 3 with 5 seconds to go!" She says, "Oh... I thought that said 30-23."

As soon as Larry went over the top, I dropped to my knees and yelled, "TOUCHDOWN KANSAS CITY! TOUCHDOWN LARRY JOHNSON!"

Wow... what a finish for a rather dismal game.

Politics - Dubya's popularity hits rock bottom, grabs shovel

Bush's Popularity Reaches New Low
58 Percent in Poll Question His Integrity
===================
38 percent- think the Bush Administration was hiding important elements of what they knew
===================
Overall, do you approve, disapprove or have mixed feelings about the way George W. Bush is handling his job as president?

Approve, 37 percent (39)

Disapprove, 59 percent (58)

Tech - "Analog Hole" Legislation Proposed

Next-Gen "Analog Hole" Legislation Proposed: "Sometimes I think that people feel that the MPAA is a bunch of Luddites,' Brad Hunt, chief technical officer of the MPAA, said in an interview Wednesday afternoon. 'In this case, we are trying to incent the consumer to embrace the digital conversion, the digital connection...and that's why we need to drive this technology forward."

So... you can't "incent" the consumer to upgrade so you'll try legislating him into it? Luddite seems to be an understatement.

Politics - Fox News Paid for DeLay's Travel

"Rep. Tom DeLay (R-TX) filed a report with the Clerk of the House of Representatives indicating he received free travel valued at $13,998.55 from Fox News Sunday for 'officially connected travel' on October 1-2, 2005, from Sugarland, TX to Washington, D.C. and back to Sugarland, TX. Rep. DeLay appeared on Fox News Sunday on October 2, 2005, the weekend after his indictment on September 28, 2005.

Almost fourteen thousand bucks?!?! Did they hire Santa to fly his reindeer down th Texas and fly this tool to DC?!?!

To quote Luke Skywalker: "We could almost buy our own ship for that!"

Humor - George Carlin

From the George Carlin calendar for Thursday, November 3, 2005:

"If this is the best God can do, I'm not impressed. Results like these do not belong on the resume of a supreme being. This is the kind of stuff you'd expect from an office temp with a bad attitude. In any well-managed universe, this guy would have been out on his all-powerful a$$ a long time ago."

Amen.

Politics - Washington Post-ABC News Poll -- Oct. 28-29, 2005

Do you approve or disapprove of the way George W. Bush is handling his job as president?

10/29/05 Approve 39% Disapprove 58%

58% disapprove? Now THAT is a mandate!

Current events - Alito nomination generates evil laughs from Reublican senators

Is... is that Bob from the Enzyte commercial?!?!